Making a move

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Day 123: The tapeworm is back...

The PMS tapeworm is back.

I ate pretty reasonably all day long, and then the afternoon hit and so did my chocolate craving... again.

The older I get the worse the PMS becomes. From the grumpiness to the cravings and the tapeworm it's getting bad.

Yesterday my sweet tooth kicked in and all I wanted was a piece of delicious confectionary delight, but all I had in the wallet was a $20 bill which meant I had to go on a scavenger hunt.

I took a look back on the Cheerleader's desk and saw a bag of chocolate covered pomegranate seeds... jackpot!

I snapped it up, but as soon as I grabbed it I realized something was wrong. I opened it up and it was empty.

There wasn't even so much as a crumble of chocolate inside that bag. I swear she licked it clean, and if I know her... I'm pretty sure she did.

Today I was pretty much in the same boat, with the exception of the 55 cents in my wallet. Not enough for chocolate but combined with the change in my desk drawer I could squeeze out a Diet Dr. Pepper which would have to do.

I walked back to my desk and saw another co-worker who always has a sweet tooth. I knew she had candy... I stalked her like a rabid dog and thankfully she let me dig in. 2 mini-snickers did the trick.

But by the time I was heading home the tapeworm was back. I needed food and a lot of it... pronto!

I stopped by Outback Steakhouse, and ordered my steak dinner. Filet, baked potato, salad and mini-lobster tails and I downed it all... along with a few glasses of wine left by one of the guests on the show.



All in all a good night, until I checked my mail.

I opened a letter from the company that manages our timecards and vacation benefits. It was a notice that my medical insurance ended at the end of the year.

What?! They mailed me an insurance card for the new year what was all of this about??

Then I remembered back to last week when I suddenly lost access to some of our shared files at work, and the personal folders in my email.

I immediately called the IT department and they came over to check things out. Evidently someone else at the company with the same last name was let go and they shut off my accounts by mistake.

Could they be related? The date on the letter corresponded to the date of her firing.

Perfect. It's exactly what you want to hear a day before your first ever ski trip.

I think I need more chocolate to deal with this.

Day 124: The Party Girl

I am the party girl.

I'm meeting the BFF and Perky for happy hour.

Perky is allergic to alcohol, and the BFF doesn't drink, leaving me as the sole imbiber at our happy hours and it has turned into a running joke.

Perky is all consumed by the culinary delights, and the BFF is ambivalent.

On several occasions when we are planning where to go, it has come up... 'let's find a place with cheap food, you can drink enough for all of us to make up for it.'

Perfect. At one point I believe someone even said 'your the lush of the group'.... wow... what a great group of friends!

I am, in fact, the one who is drinking at our dinners, usually because work or some other project has pushed me to the point of needing the sweet nectar of the gods to relax me.

I guess I am my mother's daughter. The family likes to give her a hard time for having a whiskey and 7 when she gets home from work. It's one drink, but it's become the running joke in our family... so much so my dad will get her wine or whiskey as a Christmas gift.

After 50 + years of marriage I suppose you do also run out of gift inspiration.

Happy hour was just that... happy! We gorged on all kids of food, which is par for the course with Perky in the house. She is small but mighty and boy can she pack it in! Maybe even more than me and today especially so.

She is starting her workout tomorrow and that means her first weigh in. Her plan was to load up on carbs and other goodies so she can make a good impression at her next weigh in. A girl after my own heart... you gotta love it!

We ate like low budget queens... chips and cheese dip... baked goat cheese... spring rolls... sliders... topped off with a salad. Yes... a salad... and then dessert. We were a little out of control.

We talked about everything from balancing our checkbooks to twitter, ex-boyfriends with Guns n Roses tattoos (not my ex thank God), to my ski trip.

It was a good time. I am a lucky, lucky girl on so many levels and for so many reasons.

Day 125: Trifecta of girlie goodness

Grumpy girl needs a vacation.

The day started with a marathon on the snooze button and a guest who decided they didn't want to be on the show because the experience didn't fit their guidelines.

Whoa... the last time I checked I was the master of that domain, but I guess not.

So I was grumpy... and holding grudge.... and I'm guessing based off my reactions to so many other things.. I'm also PMS-ing.

I mentioned the HR director's voice sounded like nails on a chalkboard and the Cheerleader decided yes I am definitely hormonal.

She is also planning an impromptu ski trip and she and I are the only 2 going.

It started as an invite for 7 people but has ended up just the 2 of us.

I've never been skiing but am excited, nervous, not to mention a little freaked out and scared.

I broke my leg getting out of bed when I was 13, I'm not sure skiing at 39 is a good idea, but I'm willing to try because what's a broken bone? I have insurance, and I'm sure they have cute paramedics right?

All day I was juggling the full time job and the part time project that is turning into a full time job, pulling my hair out because one was pulling me away from the other and I was getting nothing accomplished with either.

Frustration set in and I was happy when my work day was done and I could head home.

I had planned to go to a reunion with my friends of Girlfriend University, but instead ended up putting out a few fires with my first ever commercial.

By the time I was done, I was ready to call it quits. I am pretty much done with commercials after this one project.... but I am smart enough to know to say never say never.

I made it home and through hours of commercial producing hell tonight, and here I sit, wine glass in one hand... chocolate in the other.... total drama and chick shows on the tv... .and sheer happiness.

There's just something comforting about the trifecta of girlie goodness.

Day 126: Match Misfortune

At work today it was a revolving door of men from match.com.

The Coffee Fairy kept sending me pictures of men who have expressed interest in her.

She is so hysterical, every picture had it's own commentary... the news anchor with his work photo.... Crocodile Dundee.... and some required none... their usernames and their photos said it all.. like 'Gentle Giant' who is a big muscle bound hunk of a man who looked like he had professional photos taken.

Another only had one photo on the profile and there were 4 people in it, one of them was a woman another a white haired elderly man. 'Which one do you think it is?' she added.

I was secretly hoping it was the old man in the back who kind of looked like he wasn't even part of the group but just decided to hop into the photo as a joke.

It was so funny I was laughing out loud at my desk, probably causing a major distraction for all of my co-workers.

The day was full of dating disasters... from the match.com photos to all of us repeatedly making fun of the fireworks girl from the Bachelor the night before.

When I got home I don't know what I was thinking, but I decided to check out match.com for myself.

It is how I met Mr. Wonderful, and I've been contemplating going signing up for the virtual dates, but I haven't really been able to psych myself up for writing the profile.

I mentioned it to the Coffee Fairy and she suggested I invite some friends over and have them write the profile for me over a few bottles of wine.

Now that I'd be up for.... if I could sit in the corner and drink while all of the besties did the heavy lifting, it could really work! Except for the keeping up with all the pesky emails, winks, nods, and whatever else they do on there now.

Then there is finding time to work it into my uber busy schedule right now. I would really want someone to do that for me too... LOL.

Ok maybe not. I kind of like being the master of my own destiny, its the control freak in me.

But, I was slightly intrigued by the idea so I decided to hop online with my old username and just see what my dating pool looks like.

To say it's shallow and murky would be an understatement.

I immediately did a search of guys 36 - 43 within a 25 mile radius, admittedly not a huge age range but one I am comfortable with so what the heck.

I scrolled down the page, and my general impression was pretty much... meh?

There was no one that even remotely interested me.

The further I scrolled the more discouraged I became.... some looked old, others young party boys, there were the guys who are probably still living with their mothers, and on and on.... then I ran across a picture that may haunt me for a while.

It was a guy I dated 8 years ago! I met him on match.com after the demise of my relationship with Shithead.

He was a total meathead from New Jersey waaaaay before it was the cool thing to be. I don't even know what I was thinking, outside of just getting back at Shithead, which is not a good reason to date.

Aaahhh young and stupid, and a great reminder... or maybe a sign that match.com is not in my future.

Day 127: Do the cats know something I don't?

What am I doing?

This commercial is exhausting. Perhaps I should say working with 4 other people, trying to communicate and schedule in between full time jobs, is exhausting.

Between my job, and all of this extra work, not to mention my social life I'm ready to explode!

Not that I'm complaining, having all of this on my resume is good, but where will it get me in life? I'm certainly no happier right now, and at last check I was still single.

Unless I meet and fall in love with a customer, doing all this extra work isn't exactly helping me. It's burning me out, but I am learning as I go.

I put on my big girl panties today and addressed the payment issue. There was a minor speed bump but we managed to get through it and my check is on the way.

At the full time job, one of the hottie chefs came on the show today. I always look forward to his visits, and it's been a while since I've seen him and he was as cute as ever.

Anytime he's around I act like a bumbling idiot. I can't form a coherent sentence, or I say the same thing over and over again. I'm either Rainman or speaking in tongues... now THAT'S attractive.

I heard a while back he is a bit of a womanizer so I backed off from the flirting, but I always wonder in the back of my brain if he's single... and if he's changed his ways, or if I can help him change his ways.

You know... kind of like how some women hope to turn gay boys straight... I kind of compare it to that.

Not that a 'player' can't eventually settle down, but I'm not sure I'm secure enough to be with that guy. Always wondering in the back of my brain if he's going to revert back to his old ways.

One of the girls at work knows I'm interested, and started chatting him up. She's married so she can flirt all she want without repercussion, better yet, she can ask those burning personal questions.

I walked over today to get him in place for his appearance and I heard her say 'so what are you waiting for? your not getting any younger? You want kids right? Are you afraid of commitment or something?'

Uh yeah she did.... this would be the reason I hesitate to have her meet any guy I'm dating unless they are the pinnacle of success and professionalism. She's brutal!

I'd hate to be her kids when it comes time to bring home their dates... yikes!

But she did find out that he's been in a relationship for a while and they are just 'having fun' so no need to put a label on it... yep... I'm done.

His recipe was way too complicated to attempt at home so I decided to eat some of the healthy leftover food in my fridge from my failed 3 day diet.

I pulled out a chicken breast I bought a week ago. I'm not one who eats a lot of chicken normally... and I'm certainly not someone who cooks a lot so I wasn't sure it was still good, but I figured it was worth a shot.

What's the worst that could happen right?

I texted the Pixie and she said it was fine, but I needed to cook it tonight, so I jazzed it up a bit and threw it in the oven.

When I was done eating it one of my cats came over and gave me a weird look. The pupils of his eyes were big and black and he was staring at me.

Then he jumped on the couch and got right up to my face and then backed away. I had a minor freak out. Did he know something I didn't? Did I just eat salmonella laced chicken??

They say animals have that weird sense about them.... they know when bad weather is going to hit, could he know something awful was about to happen to me?

Meh? I doubt it, but if I wake up in the middle of the night with shooting pains in my stomach I'm really going to start to wonder.

The way they are looking at me tonight makes me wonder if they think I am the foreign one in their home, instead of me allowing them to live in MY home.

Who is the caged animal? I think it's me... caged by my life at the moment at least.

Day 128: My first commercial

Today is the big day. It's the day we're shooting my very first commercial.

I'm not exactly nervous, but I did want to make sure I was prepared.... too bad I wasn't.

I don't know what is wrong with me?!

I was up late last night with the party but made sure to sleep in this morning. I set the alarm for 10am... yeah I know 10am.... but I was up until 3am so that really isn't so crazy.

I woke up made some coffee and decided to relax and catch up on some tv. I had plenty of time to get ready and I was doing pretty well, until I realized I needed a few things for the shoot.

I didn't have the address printed anywhere but I knew it was in the email in my phone so it shouldn't be a problem getting to it and putting it into my GPS.

Well it wouldn't have been difficult except I did a software upgrade 2 nights ago and everything is organized differently now.

So there I was racing to the beauty store for blotting papers and hairspray, while trying to go through 60 emails to find the one with the address in it, so I know which freeway to get on.

I popped into the store and immediately asked for help finding what I needed. I'm sure the worker there was a bit annoyed with me but I really didn't care. I needed help, and I was giving them money and it's not like I was being rude.

On the way out to the car I found the email... jackpot! I immediately got the directions and jetted the 30 miles to the shoot location.

When I arrived my photographer was already there and getting to work. I chatted with the client and we got down to business.

All in all it went really well. I think we've got some great video, the script is good, and she did a great job on camera.

About half way through she handed me a check, and I looked at it and realized the amount is what we agreed upon for the rest of the crew and it didn't include my portion.

I didn't quite know what to do?! I am so bad with confrontation and it is my first job so I am unfamiliar with how to handle these situations so I just took the check and put it in a safe place and decided I would deal with it all later.

I came home and went through my emails thinking maybe there was a miscommunication and she thought it was one fee for the entire project but I think I was pretty clear, although not as clear as I could have been which is a good lesson to learn.

So now comes the confrontation, luckily she sent me an email thanking me for the wonderful experience so I feel like there is an opening.

Now I just have to put on my big girl panties and do it.

I called the BFF to get her help with the wording on the email. Her fiancee just left town and she's sad. We talked and caught up for a while and during the conversation I I told her about crying to the Kelly Clarkson song.

She immediately busted out laughing... I believe her response was 'Kelly Clarkson?! That's hysterical!' My thoughts exactly.

I can always count on her to laugh with me in these situations. She's great at helping me see I can't take myself too seriously.

We had a great conversation and as badly as I feel for her with her fiancee leaving, it's a great opportunity for us to spend some quality time together before she gets married. Something I plan on taking full advantage of while I have the chance.